Author Archives: Shane Reed

Jim Croce / Operator

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Worst Fight Scene Indeed

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More on the Telekinetic Human Race

FACT: There was no second gunman on the grassy knoll.
FACT: If a tree falls in the forest.. it most definitely makes a sound.
(let’s quit wasting our parents’ money on philosophy degrees)
FACT: We landed on the moon.
(it was not a sound-stage in Van Nuys like you an your fixed-gear friends like to think)
FACT: Human beings will become a telekinetic species within 3 generations!

What this means is the following:
We will be able to log on to the Internet using devices integrated with our biology.
Biomedical Engineering is the field.
It is commonplace already for patients to have implants of many kinds, ie. internal pacemakers, defibrillators, titanium plates, ball and socket joints, time release medications. etc..
Scientists can already print a chambered heart via inkjet and stem cells as you’ll see in the TED video 2 down.
.             You may be thinking this sounds like a bad scifi plot, and I agree. Movies are typically wrong about style and timeline in a future film. Blue jeans and a t shirt will never turn into shiny spandex with angular sleeves. Furthermore, HAL hasn’t pushed us into the monolith’s cerebral-worm-hole-cortex-womb.  Rather, it’s a random sunny day in 2010, not Stanley-boy Kubrick’s 2001. Films can be surprisingly correct though when it comes to inventions. Aircraft / Spaceships / Submersibles / Skype video conferencing (Jetsons) / A Jetpack you can buy from Martin Company for 100K / and so on and so forth….

Basically, if you could manufacture your iPhone out of stem cells, implant it in your body, and switch to Verizon without breaking your contract…you would be the smartest person in the history of humanity. You could call, text, email, skype, read, tune your guitar with perfect pitch, learn Greek and other dead classics, play doodle jump, and take over the world… or at least all the humans that don’t adopt the new technology and end up the low intellect slave race to the new iSapien Sapien.

If you don’t believe me, watch these videos, look at the economy and realize the US needs an entirely new industry (like the .com boom / only now the BioTech bubble) to employ all of us over-educated, altruistic artist, bloggers, fantasy foot-base-basket/balling twenty somethings with great personal brands that make us no money.

Seeds of proof:

Researchers at the University of Wisconsin-Madison have created a revolutionary new way for sufferers of locked-in syndrome to communicate using only their brainwaves…
Adam Wilson, a biomedical engineering doctoral student, has developed a system in which a person can write using only his or her brain. By attaching an EEG to the user’s head that can recognize different brain patterns that correspond to different letters, the system can be a keyboard for those who lack almost all voluntary motor function but whose brains work normally.  Via io9.com

We’ve already figured out how to replicate sight and sound.
What makes you think we won’t figure out the rest of the senses?

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Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark

OMD “Electricity” 1979
I wasn’t born yet. Neither were you.


Even if you were born before 79, you were still too young to have been into this when it first came out.
I first heard the NOFX cover of “Electricity” on ‘Before You Were Punk Vol. 2.’
That comp came out in ’99.
20 years after the original.
John Hughes died in 2009.
Another 10 years.
And now I’m hearing a lot more Pretty in Pink, Weird Science, and OMD references.
30 years was the nesting period for me to be directly introduced to a melody I’ve known for 10 years.

In Back to the Future, Marty McFly goes back 30 years in his 1985 Delorian to 1955.
If that movie came out today, Marty would go back to 1980.
Instead of ‘Johnny B. Goode’ at the Under the Sea Dance, it could be “Electricity” or “If You Leave” or inevitably something that would end up being in a John Hughes film.

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New Condiment

KETCHULA!
No joke..every meal wins with this one.
It changed my life.
Now change yours.

I mix equal parts, but feel free to find your own personal ratio.

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The Problem With Bands…

Bands / Like high school relationships / Break up.

Unfortunately, when the chubby bassist gets a chick for the first time, you kick him out of the band cause he can’t make it to practice. “Yeah he’s got the chops on the slap bass, but he’s just not our look,” you tell your remaining bandmates.

When the drummer gets his kit, your early 90′s CD organizer, and your box of Discmakers merch stolen out of his pick up, you and the band conclude he wasn’t in the pocket enough anyway, then dump him.

When your Phish/Dream Theatre inspired band gets a bad write up cause the guitar harmonies weren’t perfect lydian syncopations at the live show, the PRS stays, the Telecaster stays, but the guy with the Mexican Strat packs his gig bag and goes.

Bands have to deal with a deck that’s stacked against them.
Divorce rates are high.
Threesomes and open relationships never work.
And if you’re the classic four piece band, you have virtually no chance of survival. Especially once you find out (if you make it this far) that the songwriter is the only one getting royalties, and that huge signing bonus you’re dreaming of is basically a bank loan.
Once you learn this, your cynicism about the music business will get you kicked out of your band.
What will you do with all those personalized guitar picks?

Anyway, I don’t know what happened to a sweet band called “The Epochs,” but they broke it off, and it’s a shame..
In vanity, I found these dudes while I was listening to my own Cosmo Speedway Pandora playlist. After I thumbs downed some terrible track that was somehow (to the music genome world) linked to me, “The Giving Tree” came up. It sounded beautiful like this:


OK…side note for bands. Whatever security options you can embed in the metadata for your tracks….DON’T. I was just about to launch into a glowing review of “The Epochs,” but can’t upload their song. I know Sandra Bullock’s afraid of “The Net.” I’m not gunna steal your track, and even if I was, I would be spreading your culture to everyone I know, like I’m trying to do right now…Ouch.

Well, since we can’t listen to “The Epochs,” I’ll just tell you they’re cool, but they broke up, and the two brothers in the band started a new project called Bluebrain. And now they have to start all over again.

Does anyone want to get together and watch “The Net”?
We could play a drinking game where everytime an obsolete internet/computer/waiting for file to save to floppy reference occurs..we drink.

Seriously..comment if you wanna drink to this. If we get enough people, I’ll buy the movie, and we’ll organize a time and place.

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Pintxo (pronounced Peen-cho) / Tapas

BAR PINTXO / Santa Monica, CA
First, when you go out to eat, talk about the blog you write for and take iphone pictures of the food. Do this until the wait staff knows you’re a critic of some sort. Doesn’t matter if you are. Don’t be fake. Be polite, cause in reality (even if you don’t write) you are a critic who publishes for your own word of mouth personal brand. Also, it’s a bounce board for you and the wait staff to interact more than usual.
We went to Bar Pintxo the day before the crowded LA Marathon, who’s finish line was 50 feet from their door. There had also been a bomb threat on the Santa Monica pier that turned out to be a homeless dude’s bag of clothes posing threat while he was bathing naked in the ocean. Long story short, it was foggy and the atmosphere that night was weird. We ducked into Pinxto and all was well again. The space is small and might feel clostrophobic if it weren’t so warm and inviting.

WINE / Planella (2008) $10/Glass
Andy, the lovely female server at Bar Pintxo, greeted us with warm sincere service although she’d already been working 12 hours on a strange day. I asked her what wines she would recomend and she brought out tasting glasses of a few wines. I’m sure they always do that, but posing as a food writer, I felt less lame in asking her to bring out even more samples. We tried various wines and settled on Planella 2008 (which Andy hooked us up with, though it was not on the menu). The wine was spicy, full bodied, with notes of red wine tasted by someone who knows very little about that scene. We liked it better than the others and that made it the most informed choice.

Quail Egg on Chorizo $5.00
How many permutations of Chipotle’s food bar can I experiment with, before it gets old? When I did my taxes last year, I printed out all of 08′s transaction history, and realized there’s only about ten restaurants I really eat at: Bay Cities Italian Deli, Yangtze, Jack N’ Jills, Tito’s, Hacienda del Rey, Ninjin Sushi, Whole Foods, Benitos, La Bodega Wine Bar, and Chipotle. That gets old. There are only so many nationalities. Remember when you didn’t eat Sushi or Thai or Indian? It was Chinese take-out on a school night or Benihana for your birthday. It’s nice to have Spain join the ranks. And what a better scene then a variety of small bites within a fringe food nationality.

Pan Grilled Duck Heart $9.00
Try new foods.
Seriously.
Why is an animal’s organs any weirder/stranger/grosser than it’s muscular system. Muscles = Meat. Heart = suprisingly delicious although skeptical and not just claiming to sound adventurous. It’s served over mashed potatoes and has light mellow leafy greens hanging out on top. If you don’t like it, big deal, you paid 9 bones for a conversation piece at work on Monday. Tell the opposite sex about it, and you might even get laid. Unless you like Creed.

Gambas / Prawns, Eyes Intact $11.00
A couple next to us asked what blog we were writing for? The food critic bit seems to open everyone up. She is an academic advisor. He is an accountant. They loooove the garlic prawns. They’d been to Bar Pintxo three times before and couldn’t get enough. Because the prawns smelled incredible as they wafted by like a high profile skillet of fajitas / and because the stylie couple was claming them / we followed suit. Other than the eyes looking at you, there is nothing unfamiliar with this dish. It pulls at your nostalgia bank of high end meals that were actually worth the money and makes you want to stand up and say “Go Food!”

Churros con Chocolate / $4.00
These are a sweet way to end the evening.
Drunk by now (cause the wine is good and a small glass of Stella is $3.00) you wait for this fan favorite.
And you wait.
And you wait…
This was the only snag of the night. All the staff needs to do, is inform you that the fried dough takes a long time to make. If your interested, which you should be, order the Churros with your 2nd to last order of Pintxos / Tapas. Ask for the check right when they bring the Churros, tip bigger than you’d like, cause that’s what we do in social environments, and sign up for your own food blog so you can write off your posh dinners on your taxes.

All in, for two, we spent $80.12 + Tip
That included:
3 Glasses of Wine
2 Stella’s
Quail Eggs over Chorizo Stew
Garlic Prawns
Pan Grilled Duck Hearts
Crimini Mushroom w/ ham and diced vegtables
Potato and Leek Soup
and Churros con Chocolate

Go there and eat! It will be one of the more exciting meals you’ve had in a long time.
www.barpintxo.com

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Give those Hipster Ears a Break and Listen to Otis


Otis Redding Pandora Station

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The Third & The Seventh / Inspiring

“I think i must make it clear. There are a few non-CG elements in the shortfilm: photographer (shot on greenscreen), pigeons, timelapsed growing flowers, flying airplane and sky backgrounds.” -Alex Roman

A fully CG generated world / except where Alex notes above.
This has turned the VFX world on it’s head.
How could one person create such a photorealistic portrayal of some of the world’s most beautiful architecture?
You should watch it fullscreen in HD on Vimeo if you really want the full experience.

“Well, after working in VIZ for years, I realized that there was a huge aesthetic difference between most clients’ commercial demands and photography of already-built structures. The lack of respect for the architecture itself in some “pure” commercial illustration was very frustrating to me. (Well, this is just my opinion, of course.)

Then, I decided to start a personal journey: to experiment with a more cinematographic and/or photographic oriented point of view of some of my favorites architects’ masterpieces.

Hence, the “TheThird&TheSeventh” project…”
-from a good interview of Alex Roman at Motionographer.com

Where is Cinema headed?
Is film dead?
Does it matter?
Clearly Alex understands film (and all of its artifacts) better than many DP’s that shoot commercially everyday.
Are you still worried about your Redrock adapter for your shitty 3CCD Cam?

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Johnny-boy Travolta sells Chu-Hi

Chu-Hi is a beverage sold out of vending machines all over Japan.
It is claimed by tourists in superlative and should be added to the list of Stuff White People Like.
Tastes basically like a Hansen’s soda, except it’s between 5 to 8 percent alcohol depending on the flavor.
If Travolta’s a fan, shouldn’t you be?  Become a fan of Chu-Hi on facebook.

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